S2EP36-Vrushali & 🐶 Blossom-Paws & Parenting: The Ultimate Guide to Pet-Child Harmony!

Herb: 00:00:19

Today I have the pleasure of introducing Vrushali. Vrushali resides in the country of India.

Her education, she has a UG Commerce degree in bookkeeping, accounting and business administration, plus a Cardiff University Lean L1 certification. By day, she is a dog's mom, parent to a human child and keeps a busy and keeps busy as a community volunteer navigating her karma yog path.

Evenings are for mentoring goal oriented senior executives who are also pet parents who mainly seek accountability in a mentor who understands that career success comes with all its mandatory networking elements and how to integrate being a loving pet parent to your pet with telepathy channeled solutions being the secret formula that ties these two. Welcome, Vishali. Sounds like a really interesting topic to bring up today. It's a pleasure to have you here.

Vrushali: 00:01:17

Thank you so much. Same here.

Kristina: 00:01:21

Excellent. Yeah, we, you know, as the podcast is for families and parents and things, pets are an integral part to most families. Right.

There are pets involved in the household usually.

And one of the things that we hear often is like, you know, oh my gosh, my pet and my child isn't getting along or oh, I'm too busy for my pet, my child and everything else that has to go in the house. So, so today we're hoping to dive into some of those topics. So thank you, thank you for being here. Let's begin with your passion.

What be what was the major draw to working with pet parents and pets and families and all of this connection that you have around all of this.

Vrushali: 00:02:00

Thank you. Well, yeah, because you, I mean, I feel everybody is multi talented. We just, we're just, you know, unique in our own ways.

And I had to pick a lane for my sanity. So I combined all my interests together. I absolutely adore animals with my own pets.

I got into being a mindful pet parent when my human child became a part of the family. And I saw how much having a pet around integrated into, you know, just soft skill development and core manner development in my child.

I'm like, okay, that's something I want to work with.

So all these little elements came together in a very nice way wherein my focal point is goal oriented working parents who have a family and the family includes children as well as pets.

Kristina: 00:03:04

Excellent. Yeah. And you know, we have had pets our whole life. I had, you know, dogs and cats growing up. Herb had dogs and cats growing up.

And then when we had our two boys, we had a little dog as well. And even though our children are raised, we still have two doggies running around. And every once in a while you'll hear them.

Herb: 00:03:24

Our last dog was supposed to be our last dog, but then we ended up with two more. So, yeah, we, we have had dogs pretty much our whole life and grew up with them. Don't know really what it's like, but yeah, completely integrated.

It's, it's every time you do anything, the, the dogs are part of the discussion and how you get by with doing it.

Kristina: 00:03:47

So let's jump into kind of the very first thing of, you know, we have a husband and wife, we have a spouse partner. We have, we have that nucleus started. Maybe there's already a pet in the family. And lo and behold, here comes child number one.

What can we do to ease that transition a little bit for the pet and for the parents? Because unfortunately, sometimes it's like, oh, yeah, they were perfect friends from the very, very beginning.

And then other times like, oh, the pet doesn't work out, so the pet has to go. Because of course we're not going to let our child go. What can we, what can we do?

Vrushali: 00:04:22

Yeah, absolutely, that's true. And it's a good place to begin with every. So what I like to say is it's a learning process. Give yourself the grace. Every combination is unique.

You know, we've learned permutation combinations while we were in school. And I like to apply what I learn in life as well. So I've got a dog who has been with the family since she was a puppy.

I've got a dog who we welcomed as a second dog and he's an adult re home rescue. So he came with his own set of behaviors and my child. So to transition parents better is you first create whatever boundaries, work for your family.

If the dog, you know, well, I'm going to call them the pet because it could be actually any kind of an animal. So if your pet, you feel that, you know, the boundary is not going into the nursery, fine. Not going into the kitchen, absolutely fine.

You get to decide as long as you, you're not being overly insensitive to, you know, the actual nature of the animal. So that's a great boundary to have. And do test runs. Don't wait for the actual event to happen.

Don't wait to, you know, day zero when you welcome the baby home. But start, you know, like we call in the corporate world WD -20 and, you know, you count down and, and practice them, you know, make.

You've got the television, you've got the mobile, make baby sounds on the phone. Animals don't have hands, so they don't know what a hug is. They feel it's a threat when somebody comes too close to them, but it's not for us.

That's the way we express our unconditional love. So, you know, have a. A toy doll and hug it around and do baby talk with it. Leave it lying on the floor.

So I come back to setting boundaries and doing test runs beforehand. Always keep treats on hand because everybody likes, you know, treats. Every animal likes treats.

Mostly keep special treats on hand when they know that this is only out when there's special occasions. And animals are. I say my animal. My dogs have trained me rather than the other way around. So they know exactly what you're up to.

So have special treats on hand so they know that they're being extra appreciated when they're behaving extra well. I think these three things are a great starting point.

Kristina: 00:07:20

I love that. Yeah, absolutely. I love the test run because a lot of parents don't think about that.

It's like, oh, yeah, maybe the animal hasn't been around a little one very much. You know, the cousins, the. The neighbors, the whatever. So, yeah, doing that test run with a doll, a baby. Right? Yeah.

And then after you've done that test run, maybe gently bring in another young child or something to help kind of see what would happen. I love those boundaries. Like, nursery. Nope. You don't get to cross the store because this is a special space now. Yeah.

And we try to do it with the kitchen, but, yeah, our two really like their treats, so. So kitchen is hard to keep them out of.

Herb: 00:07:58

Well, one of them usually sits on the edge and watches. And if the one that's usually kind of underfoot seems to get a treat, then he'll come in and is like, oh, can I have something too?

But if she's not getting anything, then he just sits by the edge and watches patiently out of the way. But if it starts to seem unfair, he's gonna be there.

Vrushali: 00:08:19

Oh, yeah, yeah. And the word to focus on is patiently. They've got endless patience.

Kristina: 00:08:25

Yes. Yep. End those patience. I'll just sit there and wait and wait and wait. So when does it become patience of waiting?

When is the right time and when is it begging?

Vrushali: 00:08:38

Yeah. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Because I had to go through with that with my girl. Now she's a golden retriever.

So you have an image of a golden retriever, and you've seen all the videos and all the shots and all the reels about what you expected and what it actually is. And it is what it is actually Relatable to her. So I devised my own plan that I count up to 10.

If neither of us budget, then I back off so that I don't, you know, I give her some room to breathe, and I'm like, okay, you win, but you're not getting a treat. So I back down, and it's like null and void situation. Most of the time it works.

I find that patience and repetition is really what gets through to her.

When I say they don't understand the word no, because when I say no treats, no going out, they cross out the no very conveniently and hear everything else. So I stopped saying the word no. But I say, or I say special treats.

Then she knows that she's supposed to behave extra or she's supposed to be extra attentive to what I'm trying to tell her.

Kristina: 00:10:08

That so makes sense because we. We do. We try to talk to our dogs, our pets, like humans, and they don't understand the words the same way as we do. Yeah.

So putting that no in front of it. Yeah, it does it. But I have noticed that really works. I mean, they're like, oh, a different sound that means something different. Yeah.

Herb: 00:10:26

Or. Or the dad sound at.

Vrushali: 00:10:29

Absolutely.

Herb: 00:10:33

You know, it's really interesting the way you described the dogs like that, because that's also how the universe kind of works as well. If you're talking about how hard something is, then you're focusing on the hardness and it can get harder.

So but if you're focusing on how easy something is, then you. It can get easier. But the universe doesn't understand the word not. So if you're saying, oh, it's not hard, then you're think.

Then you're on a hard scale and the universe thinks you want it hard. But if you say, oh, it's easy.

But then if something is really not easy, and sometimes it's really, really not easy, you try and put stuff on the easy scale and you use the words. Because the universe doesn't hear that. Not either. Just like the dogs don't hear that. No. Or not. So be careful of the words you use with.

With your dogs and the universe.

Vrushali: 00:11:30

And I like how you bring it up because that is exactly how my dogs led me on my soul path to say, I realized that they somehow know beforehand, you know, I'm coming home, or I'm going to discipline them and they need. She needs to hide under the sofa. I'm like, how does she know? I haven't said a word.

And that's when you know this whole different world of non verbal communication opened up and it's been a treat so far.

Kristina: 00:12:05

That is so very true. So we recently moved and at our new house, sometimes the dogs stay with grandma, right?

And so when we go out and the dogs stay with grandma when we come home, they are absolutely ecstatic. But she said they can hear. They know like two to three minutes before we even get home. So they, they start changing their behavior.

Sometimes they start vocalizing before we even get in the driveway. And she's like, I am amazed at how attuned they are to whatever it is that lets them know that you are coming home.

Vrushali: 00:12:42

That's very true.

Kristina: 00:12:44

Why? How do they do that? Do you know how they do that? What have you, what have you found out about that?

Vrushali: 00:12:49

Oh, well, yes, I do know this, the technical term for that and I do know that intuitively as well. It's also, it's just such a special feeling that somebody is there waiting, you know, with just no judgment or no sign of fatigue.

It's just that welcome home. It could be as short a time as 10 minutes, a quick run out, you know, or it could be, you know, two days, two hours.

It's the same sort of longing and welcome that receive. And it makes me feel so special that, you know, I've done something really wonderful to deserve all this attention. And the technical term.

Well, so because we are all connected energetically how much ever we want or we don't want to accept that telepathically when we start because we say this in our minds even though we don't realize it sometimes that. So like while we're doing our work through the day, we keep track that, you know, I've got to pick up the keys and walk out the door.

I've got to get into my car. This is where I'm going. So this conversation.

When they hear the word I'm going home, they hear the word home and they know that now I can tap into my human's conversation because it relates to me. So they're absolutely keyed in.

Herb: 00:14:20

I think they also have a little bit less in the way. You know, there are so many times where it's like you start thinking about a friend you haven't talked to in a long time and they'll call.

When I was in college, I had a really good connection with my mom and Christina and I shared. She would be, oh, I need to talk to your mom. And I'd be like, okay, she'll call in about five minutes.

And about five minutes later my mom would call, and she would be like, it's just this connection. But, you know, then life starts happening and doubts start creeping in, and you stop listening to that and you stop trusting that.

But then still, sometimes you think about that friend and they call and you think, oh, that's weird. I was just thinking about them. Well, dogs don't have all of this life stuff on top of it.

So when they start thinking about their people, it's like, oh, hey, they're on the way. So they can feel that. So we have that. We have that interconnectedness, but we. We tune it down, we tune it out.

Apparently, with dogs, you've actually tuned that up, and now you actually can communicate through some of those energetics with the dogs. Is that correct?

Vrushali: 00:17:06

I do, yes. And you explained it very well. It's exactly. It's very similar to what you just said about thinking of someone and they call.

That's one of the examples I give when sometimes people don't understand what telepathic conversation means. And I'm like, okay, think of it this way. And then they sort of kind of get it.

Kristina: 00:17:30

That is so cool.

So whenever, maybe there's a change in the family, you know, you brought the baby home, you have the boundaries set, things are going well, but then all of a sudden the pet kind of changes. It's like, what happened that now maybe the pet might be a little bit snappier or maybe avoiding the child a little bit more.

Can you tune in a little bit for parents and maybe give them some things to look out for before that even happens?

Vrushali: 00:17:57

Sure. Yes. Well, I wouldn't say before it happens, but I would say it's good to be prepared. One thing is.

Now, this is a contradiction, but it is the way it is. So the way I explain it is, you know, you normally don't won't yell your frustrations out at a stranger.

You will normally yell out your frustrations to somebody you know.

So similarly with dogs, with animals, you know, snapping or getting a little aggressive or not getting out of their comfort zone, they will do this with only somebody who's very close to them, not because they don't care, but because they've got a frustration, and it's built up to such a level that they can't do anything else but to be out of their normal behavior. In this case, I always keep a long leash handy so that if the time comes that they need to be tethered somewhere, it doesn't feel like a punishment.

But I get to allocate a space to them which Is still very much a part of the family, Just that they are tethered and everybody stays safe. It's also from a telepathic aspect, they try and tell us what all is.

I am trying to think of the right words, behaviors, behavioral changes in the humans is what they kind of reflect.

And the example I'll give here is when you're playing with paint, when children are playing with paint and they splash paint over themselves, and they stand in front of the mirror and they think the paint is on the mirror. So they wipe the mirror, but the paint won't go away unless they wash their overalls or wash their face.

And that's what the animal is trying to reflect. That running around in circles or the zoomies that they do. Or not napping during their regular nap times, drinking too much water, itching away.

These are some very classic examples where, for example, drinking too much water could mean that the child is having a growth spurt and they're now so much into playing that they forget to stay hydrated. And, you know, we just have so much going on, we don't realize that. So the dog is trying to say, okay, I'm drinking water.

Can you find out that, you know, relate to it for your. For my human sibling.

Or if the animal is itching more than usual and it's not a pest issue, it could be that the mum or the caregiver is constantly worried about something and they're not thinking it out, and it's affecting their mental health. And the animal is like, okay, I'm itching now. Can you relate to that? And I feel that this is what the animals are actually trying to say.

Kristina: 00:21:25

Oh, my gosh, that makes so much sense because they are so in tune to us. You know, they know when we're sad, they know when we're happy, et cetera. I hadn't thought about the worry part. Right.

If we're worried, we're anxious, etc. They're trying to tell us, yeah, I know you're upset. Let's. Yeah. Oh, my golly. Okay.

Herb: 00:21:42

Yeah. There. There are times when our. My little dog, it's like, I don't want her around. And somehow when it's like, I'm frustrated, and it's like, I'm.

I'm gonna kill this little dog. This is the time that she decides to, like, be right here.

And she'll, like, put one foot on either side, and if I try and pull her away, she'll, like, dig in. It's like a hug. And she, like, holds on and I'll make like frustrated sounds and she'll dig in and it's like her life is in danger.

And it's like she holds on tighter and it's like, what? And it brings me into the moment and out of whatever I'm doing to focus on her.

So sometimes it takes me out of some dark place, places or some frustrations and it changes. I'm. Oh, I'm frustrated at that now. I'm frustrated to her and then she's cute and I end up snuggling her. So.

Vrushali: 00:22:36

Yes, yes, definitely.

Herb: 00:22:39

And I keep pointing because she, she sleeps in our lap during the conversation.

As soon as it's over, as soon as we say a couple of certain words that indicate that, that we're done, and I'm not going to say that, she will jump up, oops, she's starting to wiggle, she will jump up and get in my face because, oh, the podcast is over. It's my turn.

Vrushali: 00:22:59

Oh, that's precious.

Kristina: 00:23:01

And just as a heads up, we will not stop recording today just so everybody can see that, because this is kind of a special show. So if you're audio only, you'll have to go over to the YouTube channel and check out how she reacts at the end. We won't stop recording today.

So for Charlie, what else did you kind of want to share with parents today?

Did you have something that, you know, really pay attention to this or is there a certain behavior that might be an indicator that something needs to kind of change?

Vrushali: 00:23:34

All I would say is, you know, once a week, check in. You know, like you check your laundry, like you check your to do list, check in.

Just spend five minutes in the morning, five minutes at different times of the day observing your animal and see if they're doing something that is out of the ordinary.

And the reason you really consciously have to make time is because we, we are around them 247 and some cues get missed just because we are so used to them and we're like, yeah, this is normal, or, yeah, this is just how they are today, or it's been a very hot day and they're resting and you try and miss cues. So every week it would be good to add this to your task list.

But also like you said about your dog just coming and putting her front paws on your shoulders, if it's a loving family unit where you've got a good give and take relationship, they are going to be non verbally vocal as well as vociferous in telling you what they need.

Kristina: 00:24:50

Yeah. And I love that. Because you're so right. I mean, as parents and we even forget sometimes, right?

So we have our little child growing up, and we forget that they've grown 2 inches because we're with them every single day. And then we go visit grandma and grandpa or aunt and uncle, and they're like, oh, my gosh, you're so much bigger.

And then you look at your child like, oh, wow, you did grow. Oh, your pants are a little bit short today. Right.

So, yeah, that is a great reminder for parent pet parents to really check in with their pet, like you said. And so, you know what? What a beautiful space.

If you can just set out on your calendar that five or 10 minutes, like you said, on a certain morning, to just, like, sit on the floor and relax with your pet and really just spend some time with them and observe them.

Herb: 00:25:32

So that brought up a saying to me, absence makes the heart grow fonder. Okay, Absolutely. If you're around somebody all of the time, it's like you start to take them for granted.

They're there, you're comfortable, it's there. But. But then all of a sudden they go away and it's like, oh, hey, there you. There's this sense of missing them, there's this hole.

And then when they come back, there's this renewed, oh, I'm happy to see you, because I haven't seen you 24 hours a day for a week. And now there's this hours that I. And now I'm recognizing how much I enjoy being around you.

But during that time, and people do that with their kids, it's like they start to take their kids for some, like, oh, no, there's breakfast, there's dinner, there's lunch, there's homework. It's this routine, it's this rut.

And you stop identifying how much you're actually in love in the moment, in what your goals were, because your goals are a family, a loving family. And. And here you are in this moment and just fading into it because it just happens every day and you forget that this is what you wished for.

Vrushali: 00:26:37

For. Very true. And the other thing, as you were saying, reminds me to encourage parents, I call it love notes. You can call it what you want as so it's.

It's journaling, basically.

But because it's called love notes, it resonates with parents a little more when you're this five minutes a week, write, you know, sit with your pet or even with your child and just write down what made you happy this week being with them. And that could Be your very own child, you know, scrapbook for when your children are all grown up to look back at the memories you created.

Because that's why we do what we do as parents.

Herb: 00:27:27

If you don't have any sort of this in your background. We didn't, you know, we were, we were Gen Xers. Both of our parents worked. We were out of the house all day long playing.

It's like there was a little bit of interaction in the morning, but we were, you know, we were called feral. So we didn't have that understanding of how to do this with our children.

Kristina: 00:27:50

Yeah.

Herb: 00:27:50

And that's what, that's kind of what they call generational trauma or a gener. So, yeah, we didn't have that. And now we have this amazing thing called the Internet and we have these podcasts and you can hear this.

And if you haven't started it yet, it's not too late. You can do it now.

If your kids two, if your kid's five, if your kid's 10, just start, you know, because it's like you hear these things that you didn't know, and it's like, wow, I didn't know that. Do it. Hop in there.

Vrushali: 00:28:25

Excellent.

Herb: 00:28:26

Now, you said that you started watching the interaction of your pet and your child when you first brought that home, and it added a dynamic. Do you, do you think that was a good thing? Do you think, like, all parents should have pets as well? To some people.

Some people, I'm never going to have a pet. I'm never going to have a pet. Then they have a kid, then they up with the pet, and then the pet is theirs instead of the kids.

So lots of dynamics there. Should, should people have pets?

Vrushali: 00:29:03

Okay. I will personally, being the primary parent and the primary animal mom will say it's a lot of work, so you've got to make the time.

And animals are always going to be the babies just because they, they don't have digits like us, they don't have fingers. So no matter how, how much they age, they can't take a bath on their own, they can't clean up after themselves, they can't cook their own food.

It's going to be a human doing it for them. So it's a lot of work. That's number one.

And secondly, if you don't have a pet at the minute, you could, you know, volunteer at places that have animals just so that you get an understanding. There's so much information out there, it gets confusing if you don't have the right guidance.

It starts as simple as do you get an amphibian or do you get a feline, do you get a canine, do you get a bird? It starts just from what kind of animal do you want to. Then you know all the details.

Male, female, breed, age, rescue, baby, everything, all of these dynamics. It will be great because that's how I started.

And I find the advantages of what I did definitely helped in making an informed decision so that I can, I call it, bypass the steep cost of regret later on. And it's not a very pleasant place to be in.

So if you don't already have an animal, your local volunteer, your local rescue, your local shelters, your local veterinarian, I believe they would be happy to have some sort of help part time over the weekends just to, you know, give out flyers if nothing else. Because by observing what that sleep little community is doing, we find out so much about what it entails to have a pet.

So that's a good place to start.

Kristina: 00:31:20

I love that. And in here in America, there's so many rescue groups asking for fosters.

And so that's another way to kind of dip your toe in knowing that that animal most likely isn't going to stay with you. But you never know.

You may fall head over heels with them, but at the same time you get that support of, oh, this is the kind of food they need, this is the kind of training they need, this is this and this. So the, the rescues help the fosters understand all of that. So then you're a leg up when you really want your own pet.

Herb: 00:31:46

Yeah.

The funny thing about fosters in the United States is unless that's actually your business, almost all fosters actually fail because it's supposed to be a temporary thing. And then the fosters stay with the people who are fostering it forever. It becomes their forever home.

Kristina: 00:32:00

There's websites and Facebook groups. Foster fails, foster fails.

Herb: 00:32:06

But yeah, there are, there are. You have to have a mindset to love a dog and let it go.

But, but if you can do that or, and, and again, the whole, this whole part of the conversation is just absolutely blowing my mind again because I've had a dog all of my life.

Kristina: 00:32:24

Yeah.

Herb: 00:32:24

And, and pets all of my life. We've had rats, we've had cats, dogs, we've had. I've never had a bird, fish. And it's like ran the gamut. Come back to dogs, sometimes cats either.

Babysat lizards.

Kristina: 00:32:40

Well, we babysat a lizard. Okay. Oh, yeah, we babysat a guinea pig. You know, all the rodent things. Yeah.

Herb: 00:32:47

So it's like, I, I've. We. We do that. We know that. It's like, it's like part of our upbringing.

So the idea of an adult never having a pet and trying to figure out how to do it, that's, like, mind blowing to me. It's like I hadn't even crossed my mind. It's like, who doesn't have a pet? And it's like, well, they had to have had one at some point.

Vrushali: 00:33:07

And like you said, it's not that we didn't have pets. It was like, I was never responsible for the dog. It is always. My parents were there, my grandparents were there. I. I was the sibling.

I wasn't the primary caregiver for that animal. So it got to me a little bit that I need to be a little. Little more responsive.

Herb: 00:33:28

Then I had a bunch of sisters. I was the only boy. All the dogs became mine. My parents are really like, I'm done chores. My mom got a dog, it became mine.

My dad got a dog, it became mine. My sister's got a dog's. It became mine.

Kristina: 00:33:43

I got a dog, it became his.

Vrushali: 00:33:48

Wonderful.

Kristina: 00:33:50

Yeah. Yeah. Our. Our little one that we were talking about is going to jump up at the end. Yeah. I wanted her.

She was supposed to be my puppet, but when she came home, he was the one that was home most, and I was off to work every day. And so she bonded with him stronger than with me.

Herb: 00:34:05

And she was. She was a really traumatized pup. So she couldn't sleep unless she was touching somebody. So she would go absolutely bonkers mad.

She had to be asleep every two hours. And if I. So if I. I had to sit down and. And she ruined my life.

Kristina: 00:34:23

Yeah.

Herb: 00:34:24

Couldn't get anything done.

Vrushali: 00:34:25

Yeah. Yeah. That's another thing which non animal owners don't understand. I do not move because then I've got a. A coach following me.

Yeah, it's two dogs and a child. So there's three coaches following the engine. And it's not fun. So I'm like, okay, settle down, everybody. I'm staying put.

Herb: 00:34:49

Oh, and if they all settle down and fall asleep at the same time, you're stuck there because you don't want to interrupt that. So you just. It's called. It's called doggy paralysis.

Kristina: 00:34:59

Calls it.

Herb: 00:35:02

Like, I don't want to move. The dog is just. I'm. She's asleep. I'm good. Just sit here.

Vrushali: 00:35:08

Yeah.

Kristina: 00:35:09

Awesome. All right, I have one more question for you. When a pet gets to be senior age. Oh, here I go. Yeah.

How do you help the kids when the kid, when the pet's getting old?

Herb: 00:35:24

How do you help the parents when the pets get in?

Vrushali: 00:35:28

Oh, dear. Okay, repeat that once again.

Herb: 00:35:31

All right, so we had our last dog for 19 years. And at 19 years we had to take it to the vet.

Kristina: 00:35:40

And.

Herb: 00:35:43

I, I still have problems with that. How, how do we talk to our children about this stuff?

Vrushali: 00:35:53

Okay. With my child, I, because I've been an active parent, I know that he likes to know about stuff. It was different when I was a child.

I was fine with not knowing stuff. I was like, oh, we're going out.

It didn't matter to me if you were going to the garden, if you were going shopping, if you were going for lunch, like, yeah, okay, do I need. I just need to wear my clothes and get. Sit in the car with my parents. But my child is very different.

So once I realized that he likes to know and how I found that out is again, an interesting story because that will tell. It should give the parents an idea about how you know, to solve the question about the how so. Because I was never interested to know.

That is what I followed. When my son was younger, if we needed to go out to the garden because all he needed to do was get, you know, be picked up by me and carried.

Because he was a toddler, he wasn't going to walk, nor was he going to wear his own clothes. So I would get him ready. I would get our bag ready and pick him up and walk out the door.

Just to keep him entertained while I was getting ready or while I was organizing the house. I would give him, for example, a coloring book. Now, now that I am ready and he's picked up and out the door.

His coloring activity was incomplete, and that would lead him to throw a tantrum. And I didn't understand what was happening. I'm like, all you have to do is sit in my arms and get out. But no, for him, he wanted to know.

And when I thought about that and then told him that we are leaving in five minutes, I gave him a time. I didn't say we're leaving now because that didn't work. That still got him riled up.

So what I tried next was, we're leaving in five minutes, we're leaving in 10 minutes. We're leaving as soon as I'm done. Which is when I realized that he likes to know.

And because he likes to know, I will tell him that when my girl's birthday comes up, she is seven years going, I'll tell him that Seven years in dog years is as, as old as I am, as old as mummy is. And they're going to get old or, you know, they going to a different place or. What does a rainbow mean? It means you can't see.

So I try and use words that he understands and I can relate to as being basic emotions. Sad, happy, away, alone. So these are the words that he knows very well.

And I tell him, using these words so that it's not heavy on him because otherwise they take on the responsibility and they feel that it's because of them without me knowing. And that's such a burden to carry. So I try and be very gentle and very mindful of what I'm telling him, but it needs to be told.

Children are resilient. I've learned that as well. He's taught me about resilience so much looking at him. So it works both ways. But this is the way I go about it for myself.

Kristina: 00:39:45

Beautiful. Ah, thank you. That should help out a whole bunch of parents around here going, what do we do when. Yeah, exactly.

Herb: 00:39:54

Yeah, we actually started with shorter lived pets with the boys. So we started with like rats and stuff that would only live for a year or two. They don't get so attached to them because, you know, they, the dog.

Rats don't play the same way dogs and cats do. So. And then, you know, we've been reading a lot of rats.

Vrushali: 00:40:16

Yeah. And sometimes you just have to tell them that they, they've gone to a farm. I mean, it's just what it is.

Kristina: 00:40:24

Yeah.

Vrushali: 00:40:24

But you've got to take the informed decision as long as, you know, everybody understands and everybody. And, and also grief is part of life.

I would say I value happiness because I know I have known sadness, you know, so it, you need to give that space as well.

Kristina: 00:40:53

Yeah, yeah, beautiful.

Herb: 00:40:55

Carl Jung paraphrases, the farther you go in the darkness, the brighter you can go into the light.

Kristina: 00:41:01

So, yeah, beautiful. This has been a wonderful, wonderful discussion.

I think we could probably keep going, but I want to make sure that our audience gets a hold of your information. So if they are ready to have a mentor to help their pet family and their, their whole family together.

If you're an executive trying to balance that you know, pet, pet life and you working a whole bunch because you're the executive for Charlie, how do they get a hold of you and get a little bit of help?

Vrushali: 00:41:29

Well, I'm on social media everywhere. If they want to send me an email, my email, I feel is very easy. I'll say it out and let's see what the audience thinks about it. It's.

Yes, at the rate. Brushaliandblossom.com Beautiful.

Herb: 00:41:49

You will have that in the bottom.

Kristina: 00:41:51

Show notes as well. Of course, all of your contact information will be there, but. Yeah.

Herb: 00:41:56

And you do have clients here in the United States, all the way in the Pacific time zone. Correct. So it's like you work with people internationally?

Vrushali: 00:42:03

Yeah, I do. Yes. So my father's pet, parent, Mentee, is in Scandinavia. So yeah, I'm. I'm all over.

Kristina: 00:42:12

Yeah.

Vrushali: 00:42:13

And of course it's nice when I like to say that we're different yet the same. So if you feel that you need a year to listen to, but nothing else, that's perfectly all right.

It doesn't have to be something that is regional per se. I'm very happy to offer support.

Herb: 00:42:40

Yeah. And Americans are really weird with their pets.

So it's like if they get sick and their pets get sick and they're given a medication and their pets are given a medication, they will make sure their pets get the medication and they won't take theirs consistently. So people will take care of their pets better than they take care of themselves.

In some cases, you know, they'll get a pet for free and then spend tens of thousands of dollars to keep it alive for a couple of more months. You just disappeared. So. Yeah, Americans are crazy for their pets and so many of them are. Are totally worth it. And because. Because pets are.

Are amazing.

Vrushali: 00:43:24

Yeah, totally worth it. That I agree.

Kristina: 00:43:26

Yes, absolutely. And they can teach us so much. They can teach our children so much.

So if you are a parent, if you are a family willing to take on that responsibility, training, feeding, bathing, vet bills, etc. Also think of all the benefits that come with it, the growth, the exploration that I'm.

Herb: 00:43:49

Yeah, it sounds. It sounds rough, but it's like we don't even think about it anymore. It's just. It's just part of. Part of life. There is no extra effort to it.

It's just family. And it's totally worth it, as you'll see when we actually end this for or almost end this.

Kristina: 00:44:04

Yes.

Herb: 00:44:06

Awesome.

Kristina: 00:44:06

So virtually as we end up, was there anything else that you wanted to say that we needed to touch on?

Vrushali: 00:44:15

Just that, you know, every animal and every family find each other just when they need each other. So give yourself the grace and enjoy what is going to unfold.

Kristina: 00:44:31

That's beautiful. Go ahead.

Herb: 00:44:32

Okay.

Now, as we, as we kind of start this next part, you do also help people who have pets that are Acting up because you have a way of communicating with pets, and you can help come up with solutions and ideas to resolve issues within families with pets. Is that correct?

Vrushali: 00:44:52

Yes, it is.

Herb: 00:44:53

Okay. So I really wanted to make that. Make that clear too, because I'm not sure that that was clear.

So if anybody out there has pets that's acting up, that the behaviors are changed, that they used to be getting along and stuff is happening weird and you don't know where to go to virtually can help with that as well and correct?

Kristina: 00:45:12

Yep, absolutely. All right.

Herb: 00:45:13

I wanted to make sure we got that out there.

Kristina: 00:45:15

Claire is clear as everything. Yeah. So we want to thank you again for being here and thank you for sharing such wonderful information.

Audience make sure you take all of these gold nuggets.

That's our job here at Bringing Education Home, is to drop the gold nuggets for you to take, not keep them in your pocket, but put them on the shelf and then take them down and use them to help your family be happy, healthy, and successful. Successful.

So make sure that you are taking all of this wonderful information and connecting with Rashali or other experts that real can help you and your family grow and develop.

Herb: 00:45:45

And with mindfulness and paying attention to your pets, they can help you identify issues that you might not be ready to deal with yourself. So sometimes pet problems aren't really problems for the pet.

They're something that you need to deal with to actually create a space that your pet can calm down. So, Rashali, thank you so much for being here today. It has been a pleasure to have you here.

So many people out there, you know, they just talk about the problems, but they're not actually out there fixing it. And you are out there helping families, helping pets, making the world a better place just a little bit at a time. And it is wonderful.

So you are on a hero's journey. So thank you for being with us here today. It has been a pleasure to have you. And that is part of the words that wake up the dog.

And the other one is that we say is when we start to say bye for now. And. And here she comes. Oh, yep. You gotta let her go.

Kristina: 00:46:37

Yeah.

Herb: 00:46:37

So here's the hug that I'm talking about. It's just one side at the moment. Oh, and now there's.

Vrushali: 00:46:45

Oh, she's so fresh.

Herb: 00:46:46

If I try and pull her away, she, like, holds on and comes back. So every day that we say goodbye on this show, this happens after we.

Kristina: 00:46:56

Turn off the recording.

Herb: 00:46:57

She will sit quietly, not make a sound for the whole thing. But as soon as we say goodbye, she pops up.

Kristina: 00:47:04

Yep. She knows. So. All right, audience, there you are. Thank you again for Shali. Thank you, audience, and we will talk to you all later. Bye for now.