S2EP20-Robert Melillo-Why Your Kid's Brain Might Be Playing Hide and Seek!

Herb: 00:00:20

Today I have the pleasure of introducing Dr. Robert Melillo. Dr. Melillo is a world renowned expert in brain health specializing in childhood and adult neurological disorders.

A clinical professor, brain researcher, and best selling author of Disconnected Kids, he focuses on ADHD, autism, OCD, ticks, anxiety and other developmental issues. Dr. Melillo is dedicated to bridging brain function, behavior and physical health.

His innovative multimodal approach, the Melillo method, has transformed thousands of lives. Join us as we explore his groundbreaking work and unique insights into the brain. This is a fascinating topic for us. Dr.

Melillo, thank you so much for being here. I'm really looking forward to this.

Dr. Melillo: 00:01:05

Thank you for having me. I'm looking forward to it too.

Kristina: 00:01:08

Thank you so much. Yeah. One of the questions we love asking our experts as they come on though is kind of your why?

A little bit of your backstory of why is this your passion? Was there a family incident, was a personal incident? What was it that got you kind of launched into all of this brain research?

Dr. Melillo: 00:01:27

When I got into health care, I, you know, I was always kind of a calling of mine, but I really fell in love with neuroscience and neurology and I came from an athletic background and I wanted to combine rehab and neurology in some way.

And so that's what I did and I went down that path and I was, you know, really at a point where my practice, I was in practice 10 years and I was doing really high level neuro rehab. I was teaching, you know, clinical neurology on a postgraduate level. I was doing research already. But then my son was diagnosed with adhd.

And then other people around me had come to me and were asking me questions and I've already always been more looking at the holistic idea and, you know, diet, nutrition exercises. And so they were asking me, you know, people that have been doing traditional approaches, they weren't getting much in the way of results.

And so, you know, my first question when my son was labeled with that was, well, what's happening in the brain? And nobody can answer that for me.

And, but they were very quick to tell me that there was nothing I could do about it anyway, which didn't really seem to make sense to me since, you know, you just told me you didn't know what the problem was, but you're really sure that you can't change it. So, you know, I'd already started doing some brain research.

So I just dove in, you know, with a father's passion and with a curiosity and professionally and a background and, you know, it just really, you know, Hit me. And as I started then using and coming up with ways of working with my son and other kids, I started to see results.

And then when I started working with kids, non speaking kids, we started to get them to speak, which was pretty shocking, to be honest. I didn't even know if I actually did that at first.

But once we were able to do it reproducibly and for me, you know, as a parent with three children, all who had different issues, but all were who you were uniquely gifted as well, I, you know, when I saw what I was able to do for the families and for the kids, you know, that became my passion. And I've spent, you know, the better part of 25, 30 years just studying, researching, getting multiple degrees.

You know, I've published over 100 articles. I have a PhD in Developmental Cognitive neuroscience and, and neuropsychology. And so, you know, this has been my passion.

And I, you know, I'm driven more and more by it every day.

I mean, we work with families that come in from all over the world, and every day I love what I do and, and I, I just want to learn more and give more.

Kristina: 00:04:26

Oh, thank you so very much. And you know what? This is why whenever I was introduced to you, I was like, we really need you on the podcast.

We have families we're working with all the time, and these kinds of issues are the things that we're dealing with.

Because as you know, supporters of homeschooling and helping those kiddos have a great fit education, we're having more and more kiddos who are having trouble because they don't fit into the regular school system because of these issues. Right. Or they can't be reached, or they have behaviors or whatever.

And so I was really so glad that when you said yes, you would come on, because we have so many questions about this. And I have families, in fact, that I'm thinking of right this minute. Right.

Kiddos that I'm working with, kids whose parents are doing the best that they can and wanting the best for their kids. So I guess the thing I would love to dive into is that topic of what is kind of going on.

How do we know what's going on with these neurological disorders, the adhd, the autism, all these different things that are popping up with our kiddos.

What, what have you found and what information maybe can we give our parents that help them understand it a little bit better and maybe help get them on the right track for some help for their kids?

Dr. Melillo: 00:05:30

Yeah, and I want to preface it by saying that everything I'm going to say, I research myself with my lab or my team or I've written about it, published papers on it. And although the consensus in research is never all the same, there's always going to be differing opinions.

I'm speaking from what I know and my experience as well.

So first of all, when we're looking at anything like adhd, even most autism, ocd, bipolar tics, Tourette's, almost any type of neurodevelopmental disorder, there is no brain injury and there is nothing wrong with the brain and there is no genetic mutation. Right?

So that's two things that I think a lot of people out there think, especially when you're dealing with, you know, kids that are completely non speaking.

And that's kind of the majority of kids I work with and where my research has been because to me, you know, understanding why they're not speaking and at the same time recognizing that these kids are literally geniuses has been, I think, one of the biggest mysteries in neuroscience and in mental health. And it's really been something that's fueled me for most of my career so that I now believe I understand that as well as anybody.

And you know, again, it's not because of what a lot of people think it is. And so therefore, right off the bat, why can't you change it?

There's nothing, there's nothing preventing you other than understanding what the problem is and then what can be done to change it.

And you know, most of the families that I get that, and I get people from all over the world, the first question I ask them, has anybody ever tried to explain to you what's happening in your child's brain or your brain? And the answer is always no. Most people are smart enough. If I say, why do you think they didn't say anything about that?

They usually say, well, they probably don't know. And I'm like, exactly, they don't know. And so if you don't know again. So that was the first question as a parent and a professional that I asked.

And that's been my search, you know, and I've written a major textbook and like I said, Over 100 scientific papers, some of my research partners have over 500 publications. And I know the answer to that. And it is something that in almost all cases it can be changed significantly in anything.

Kristina: 00:08:12

So yeah, so, so like our son, you know, we're fortunate he's on the autism spectrum and he is high functioning. He was able to, you know, have full develop speech and things like that.

But when we were teaching him when he was young, learning how to speak, it was just interesting, the way we saw his patterns and the way he talked and things like that.

He would start talking about something, and we would say something, and then the next time he said something, it would seem like he was three steps ahead. Right. It was like all of a sudden he was up here, and we were still back here. And so the. The conversation was dist.

Disjointed because of those kind of jumps and leaps. And so once we realize that, then we could understand and bring him back a little bit. It's like, oh, wait a second, kiddo. You skipped this step.

We're still trying to understand this before we get to this next step up here. So is that kind of what's happening? Does the brain just, like, skip things or. Because they're so fastly thinking ahead that that's why it's not.

Dr. Melillo: 00:09:08

Yeah, a lot. So all of these issues fall under the category of functional disconnections.

So in neuroscience in the 90s, we started with starting to realize that most problems were not injuries or genetic mutations or chemical imbalances. They were problems with communication between networks known as functional disconnections. And that's been the main area of our lab and my research.

And the main disconnection that happens is between the two hemispheres, and that happens during maturity. Right. So one of the things I've looked at is what happens.

And we know that almost all mental health issues, even in adults, really start in childhood and partly, maybe even in the womb. They're not genetic, but what we call epigenetic. They have to do with genetic expression.

And what happens is that we've shown that in most neurobehavioral issues in children and adults, there's a maturational delay where brains are slowed down or they're more immature, and then other areas may speed up and be beyond. But this is also superimposed on natural traits that they get from their family. And it starts with a gift. Any kid that's on.

On the spectrum or in any of these disorders, it really starts with they have certain areas of their brain that are naturally gifted and stronger than most people. Kids on the autism spectrum, every single one of them is essentially a left brain genius.

But what happens is there's a very careful way that the brain is supposed to grow. The right brain is supposed to take the lead in development for the first three years, and then the left brain.

And this creates a delicate balance in where the brain should cooperate, but they also cross Inhibit what happens. And what we've found in our research, and there are markers for this, that that alteration happens.

And in autism, what happens is the brain isn't going to the next stage of maturity. It's being held back. And that left brain comes online too early, and it holds back the right brain. But now their left brain is brilliant.

So, like you're saying your son is faster. We've literally shown that their brain is processing faster than normal in certain areas of their brain.

And they're brilliant, but they're processing slower than normal in other areas of the brain. And that prevents the proper communication and integration.

And that is where all the symptoms live, not only in the cognitive ability, but in the immune system, in the autonomic system, in the digestive system, in the whole body. It all comes from the brain, and not the gut or not the immune system. That's not the initiator of it.

Herb: 00:12:04

And so then the recovery, the getting better would be actually then strengthening the parts of the brain that. That have been missed, that are slowed down and working on that. And then once those come up, then it starts balancing the brain.

Is that how is that how this works?

Dr. Melillo: 00:12:21

Right, where, you know, when we're working with really significant imbalances, we may even have to kind of slow down the strong side of the brain a little bit because it dominates over the other and won't allow it. And so even if we're stimulating it, it won't let it come up. But we have to first look at what's holding it back to begin with.

What is the root cause? And the root cause really has something to do with genetic expression, but not really any mutations. But it starts with the way the brain develops.

And what really guides development more than anything else is movement. And the foundation of all movement is in something called neonatal reflexes or primitive reflexes.

This is my main area of research, especially of late. I've published more than anybody in the world. And what we know is that these reflexes should be coming on that allow the baby in the womb.

So a baby should automatically get into the right position in the third trimester, around 38, 40 weeks, get down in the birth, birth canal, be upside down and backwards, be deep enough down without the cord wrapped around their neck. It happens because there are certain programmed reflexes that come in that allow them and initiate that movement.

We work with many babies or many kids that are in breech position, have the cord around their neck.

The moms need to be induced, or they end up with C sections and right off the bat, I say, okay, these reflexes aren't coming on the way they're supposed to. And then they should use these reflexes to help get themselves out of the birth canal. And many kids need forceps or need assistance or get stuck.

And that again tells me that there's a delay here already. And then outside the womb, the first one is, do they latch on and can they breastfeed?

If a mom chooses to do that, about 85, 90%, especially of our non speaking kids, could not latch on appropriately. Oh my gosh. So then do they roll over? Are they doing the commando crawl? Are they crawling? All of those steps matter very tightly.

The idea that there's this wide range in what kids can. Completely wrong by my book. And the bottom line is what we see is that.

And what our research has shown is that in most kids that have any sort of delay, we did the largest age match control, double blind study looking at autism in children, adolescents and adults. They have these retained reflexes. They don't go away. If they don't come on on time or fully, they don't go away.

And they're supposed to go away at one when every child should be able to walk a few steps, talk a few words and point and have good waving and eye contact. If that's not happening, it's not happening because these reflexes aren't going away. And now it holds the brain back and that is the initiator.

And then this usually leads to an imbalance. So not only do we need to address the imbalance, we need to take away these reflexes that are holding the brain back.

And if we don't do that, we're not going to be able to balance the brain, but we're not also going to get rid of the reflexes unless we balance the brain. So those two things are intimately involved with one another.

Kristina: 00:15:59

Wow, that is so interesting. I didn't even think about that. I mean, I've heard of studies before about, you know, how kids who stand up and walk before they crawl.

Lots of times, those kiddos, there's just something off about them, right? And they. I've heard about crawling therapy where you take them back and you actually have them crawl and things like that.

And that was quite a while ago, but what you're saying totally makes sense. It's curious though, because my situation was a little bit different. I actually ended up having an extended labor.

And so my son was in labor 24 hours and then he came out and things seemed to be going fine until he was about 18 months old. And then that's when we really noticed things.

So I'm not sure if it fits up with what you've kind of learned or if it might be one of those kind of one off stories does not quite match up or we go.

Dr. Melillo: 00:16:45

Through all the steps.

Kristina: 00:16:46

Yeah.

Dr. Melillo: 00:16:47

So do you want to do that? I want to explain. I want to show you something. So, okay. Over. Okay. Around three to five months. And he was on his belly, no problem.

Kristina: 00:16:58

Oh, yeah.

Dr. Melillo: 00:16:59

Commando crawl on his belly.

Kristina: 00:17:01

Yeah.

Dr. Melillo: 00:17:02

An appropriate level.

Kristina: 00:17:03

Yep. He was there until about almost 18 months.

Dr. Melillo: 00:17:07

What do you mean he was there until 18 months?

Kristina: 00:17:10

He was up.

Herb: 00:17:11

He seemed normal.

Kristina: 00:17:12

He seemed normal. He seemed to be hitting those milestones.

Dr. Melillo: 00:17:15

Appropriately until he didn't drag one leg and he, you know, do it favor. He walked at. When did he walk?

Kristina: 00:17:25

Between 10 and 12 months. He was taking his first steps and things.

Dr. Melillo: 00:17:29

He spoke then?

Kristina: 00:17:31

Yes, he was saying words.

Dr. Melillo: 00:17:32

He was pointing at that point.

Kristina: 00:17:34

Yep.

Dr. Melillo: 00:17:35

And then he regressed at a certain point.

Kristina: 00:17:38

Yeah.

Dr. Melillo: 00:17:38

Where does the regression come in? So even if they hit those milestones, if the reflexes are there, because it's not just did they hit it on time, it did they do it right.

Meaning some kids will roll over because they extend back. That's not the way it's supposed to happen. And that may even happen early. They're supposed to lift up and then roll.

So when you really look carefully at this. But the bottom line is if they regress, it's because these reflexes didn't go away. And now that left brain is coming online too early.

Now, between 1 and 2 should be the peak of right brain development. But what happens is if it comes online too early because the child is gifted there, as it comes on, it starts to push down that right brain.

Then as it gets over two or close to three, it might completely push it down. And then we see a regression. So either way, you know, very few kids are like what you're saying.

And again, even your delayed labor may have something to do with that. But, you know, the fact is. And so you were able to. Did you choose to breastfeed him?

Kristina: 00:18:53

Oh, yeah, he did.

Herb: 00:18:54

And I gotta say that when you talked about rolling over, he did roll over by pushing himself backwards. Like you said. He didn't do the front rollover as often.

Kristina: 00:19:03

Yeah, I remember that.

Dr. Melillo: 00:19:04

Let me tell you, dad, I'm really impressed, because most fathers would never remember.

Herb: 00:19:10

Well, it was 30 years ago, but it flashes. And with the brain damage, the way my brain works, it comes and goes. So it's Weird for me too. I don't understand the way my head works anymore.

Dr. Melillo: 00:20:58

You remember that, and that means you're. That just shows you're a good father. And I wouldn't blame anybody if they didn't remember it. But the fact that you do is actually pretty amazing.

But the bottom line is it really is this alteration and when there's slight alterations, it kind of catches up and then it's superimposed on these gifts.

But once this imbalance takes place, it doesn't self correct and everything is depending on whether there's more of a right brain delay and the left brain comes online too early or the opposite. Which is really what we see in like dyslexia, learning disabilities, bipolar, many types of social anxiety.

But again, they're all, all these kids are gifted. So for instance, my daughter, you know, she had dyslexia basically when she was a kid or she struggled with that.

And she also struggles with some levels of social anxiety and, and you know, over reading emotional cues and feeling of being rejected and. But she also started writing unbelievable songs at the age of 10 and now she's a very, very successful singer songwriter in Nashville.

Zack Brown produced her album and we have a podcast together because all the people down there in Nashville have a similar history as her because all these gifted right brain dominant people, but they all suffer with a lot of that social anxiety or feelings of guilt or shame or self esteem issues or imposter syndrome or procrastination. And they may have struggled in school with remembering details or with reading or with math.

They may struggle with a little bit of depression at times. So it's. But they're all incredibly gifted. So that's the thing though.

But with my work, what's very cool is we can get rid of the disability or the deficit without the gift. And that's always our goal.

Kristina: 00:23:05

That is so amazing. I, I'm so excited to dive into even more of your information and things like that.

Before we started the actual recording part, I talked a little bit about a couple of students that I'm kind of working with. And they are not completely non verbal. Right. They do a few, you know, they were like parrot words, things like that.

Another boy is definitely into music. He basically sings all day long and so you kind of know what's going on with him because of what he's singing. Right.

And he's improved a lot since I've been helping with mom and education and things like that. But at the same time, you know, we're always curious, is there anything More that we can do for them.

So you said you were going to kind of explain what might be happening, why they only parrot words or why they might be on the song kind of.

Dr. Melillo: 00:23:47

Right?

Kristina: 00:23:48

Yeah.

Dr. Melillo: 00:23:48

So you can have language delays for either a left brain delay or a right brain delay that are, you know, let's say three years old.

If a child's not speaking appropriately or not at all or less, it could end up being a left brain delay that might be dyslexia or learning disability or what we talked about. Or it could be a right brain issue where it might be ADHD or it could be autism spectrum and it might end up being non speaking autism.

And they're completely different mechanisms, but at that point they can present the same.

The difference is that the child who really has more of a left brain delay usually points and has good nonverbal communication and good eye contact and is usually a very social kid.

Whereas kids that have the right brain delay, they're usually not pointing, they don't have good eye contact and they're not really approaching other kids. They prefer to be by themselves because the main drive of the right brain is really attachment to other people. So you have to look at that situation.

Now you could say that, you know, the right brain usually communicates more by singing. You know that people that have left brain strokes may not be able to speak, but they can sing.

And you know, the singer songwriter is typically that right brain dominant person. But again, not knowing what that whole child looks like.

But what we see with kids on the non speaking end of it, this has been a lot of my career has been, I think that's been one of the biggest mysteries in neuroscience is why don't these kids speak, especially kids on the autism spectrum when we know that their left brain skills in many cases are accentuated.

Like I'm sure your, your son, if we went through him, he's probably brilliant with like memorizing things or maybe with math or maybe he read early or maybe he spoke early or he's very articulate. All of these left brain skills are advanced in, in them and they, and they may have overactivity of the left.

So like ticks or stimming or behavior, those are all over activity of specific areas of the left brain.

So like ticcing and hyperactivity come from an area called Broadman Area 6, the supplemental motor area on the left that's overactive because the right is underdeveloped or immature. OCD comes more the prefrontal areas of the brain. So we know that many of the kids, even the non speaking ones, are hyperlexic. They can read early.

I had a kid the other day that was 18 months old that could memorize a whole book word for word, because he was reading it. And so, you know, it's kind of like, all right, why would they not be able to speak if their left brain is actually advanced?

And it's not a left brain problem. It has to do with. And hyperlexia and echolalia. And scripting. What, you're talking about the child saying phrases?

Yeah, hyper connectivity of the two main language centers in the left brain. Wernicke's, which is for receptive, and Broca's for expressive. So it's hyperconnected.

When we see scripting or echolalia, what we see is that there's a delay on the right side and an area of the brain where we have what's called interoception, where we feel pain and hunger and thirst and hot and cold, that is delayed because the left brain suppresses it. So these kids are very disconnected from their body, and they don't form normal sensory motor maps.

You should form a 3D map in our brain of our body, and the face and the lips and the mouth is the biggest part of that map. And the right brain has a whole map for our whole body.

Once we develop that map, then we develop a motor map in which we can move those parts of our body the way we want intentionally. The brain generates all these automated movements, and that's what ticks and stimming and stereotypical behaviors are.

They don't take a lot of conscious movement. They just are generated. And so the reason why they're not speaking is not because they don't know the words.

We know that these kids know all the words beyond what we think.

Kristina: 00:28:30

Yeah.

Dr. Melillo: 00:28:30

Because they don't feel their body, they don't build a sentry map, they don't build a motor map, and they can't move their body. And especially their mouth and their face and their lips. Many of them. Tell us, tell us. I don't feel my tongue. I don't feel my mouth.

I don't know where my body is. I don't feel it. I don't know where my hand is unless I'm looking at it. They are totally disconnected from their body.

And the right brain also drives the desire to have a conversation or to share experiences. The left brain really wants to only talk about needs and facts. It doesn't want to have a full conversation.

Herb: 00:29:12

So once we identify a specific Part how do we start overcoming that? So a child with autism, how do we start building that back or turning it down? What are the steps?

Is there stuff that we can do without going deep into it? How do we start making these changes?

Dr. Melillo: 00:29:35

Preface. My book Disconnected Kids, which just came out in the third edition, has been one of the best selling books in the genre of all time.

It's translated into 18 languages and we've updated it with a lot of my new research.

That book is an instruction manual of how to assess your own child or even yourself as an adult, because whatever you have as an adult started in your childhood. And it goes through a way to assess yourself, identify where the main problems are, and put together a program that can help remediate it.

So that book goes into it in pretty good detail, but it's a very explainable.

But you know, simply put, the first thing we need to do is to try to get rid of these primitive reflexes and to improve movement and to then use sensory stimulation to stimulate the brain to literally grow, but grow more on one side than the other.

And so what we do is we have a series of different activities stimulating the reflexes, exercises that we train the parents at home or the individual. And we also work in our office with them and we work with them to get rid of these reflexes. It usually takes somewhere around a year to do that.

But then we do sensory stimulation with like light, sound, music, vibration, smell, spinning, inner ear stimulation, flashes of light. What we're doing is we're trying to change the frequency in different networks. And we do, we do, we measure that before we do it.

We do an extensive test to really identify this. But one of the things we do is called a qeg. We measure brainwave activity to see.

And what we see is that slower brainwaves means that that area of the brain is immature. Faster brain waves, if they're faster than normal, it means that brain is too fast.

And we can identify these areas and then we can use different frequencies to balance this out. Frequencies of light, frequencies of vibration, frequencies of smell, of movement.

And then we can use things like electrical devices like transcranial electrical current or alternating.

We can use different photobiomodulation laser light to again induce different brainwaves in different areas where we can slow one side down and speed the other up. But we have to start with the body and work our way up before we go directly to the brain.

And then we do cognitive based activities like academics, or we work with speech, or we teach them how to, how to spell with a letterboard so that they can start communicating. Or we use neurofeedback to help them train their brainwaves.

And then all of this is also included with pretty extensive neuroimmune work with looking at food sensitivities, diet, nutrition, identifying if there's inflammation and being able to do things to be able to modify that inflammation. But all of that, if there's a problem with leaky gut or food sensitivities, all of that is secondary to immaturity in the brainstem and the brain.

So that isn't the, that isn't the final solution. It's important and we do it. But that isn't the root cause. What we're dealing with is the root cause in the brain.

Herb: 00:33:19

So age is obviously younger brains develop quicker, easier. So finding this stuff at a young age and recovering it is probably a little easier than when they're old.

Dr. Melillo: 00:33:31

But.

Herb: 00:33:32

So my, my son is, is 30 years old, 33. If we brought him in, would we be able to see significant changes in a 33 year old as opposed to.

Kristina: 00:33:43

Working 7, 8 year olds?

Herb: 00:33:44

With our 7 or 8 year olds?

Dr. Melillo: 00:33:46

Yes, it depends.

The only thing in the adulthood, I mean, you know, we work with adults, we have an adult room and we have a child, we have a child side and we work with, you know, 30 year olds with bipolar or with high functioning autism or adult ADHD or anxiety or schizophrenia.

Herb: 00:34:06

About brain damage?

Dr. Melillo: 00:34:09

Yeah, we work with brain injury as well. I mean, you know, that's, I mean, I'm trained in clinical rehabilitation, neuropsychology.

I've worked in, you know, my residency was in some of the best brain rehab centers in the world. So I'm very familiar with that. But most of what we work with, you know, does not have any brain damage, but it's a similar thing.

But we can get, the only, the only limiting factor in the adults is their motivation to change.

You know, if they, if they lack self awareness, if they really don't think that there's any need for them to have any treatment or they don't desire it, then there's nothing you can do. Right. We can't make them do that. And that's completely their choice.

And you know, many people that have right brain delays, they do lack a certain level of self awareness.

Like they don't realize that they may come off socially awkward or if they realize, they don't know, they have no idea why and they have no idea how to change it. And they may not have as much of a drive to have you know, social, social connections or not, but if they are motivated, then there is no limitation.

Neuroplasticity is there for our whole life. The younger someone is, it's good, but they're more limited on what they can do.

The older somebody is, it's, you know, their brain may be not quite as plastic, but they can do a lot more and they can do a lot more for themselves. And so therefore they can get great results. So we, we work with all ages.

I mean literally we're working with a four month old now and we're working with a 75 year old who has Parkinson's. So we work with all age groups because it's all developmental. To me it's almost all other than a brain injury.

But then a brain injury can be superimposed on a developmental imbalance and you need to consider that genetic disorders also superimposed on imbalances. So the imbalance part is really the key.

Kristina: 00:36:17

To me absolutely love this. Thank you so very, very much.

All those explanations make sense to me as an educator and I'm pretty sure they're going to make sense of our parents as well.

And I want to let you know that, you know, you were talking about the primitive reflexes and stuff and that's actually the free gift that will be in the show notes down below for parents that they'll have access to get started with that and then be able to explore further. So Dr. Mello, this has been amazing and I know we're kind of running out of time.

Thank you so much for all that information, for giving parents some hope.

It's like, you know, there is something else they can try because like I was talking about, some of the families I do work with, they've already done the nutrition route, they've already been trying supplements and things like that. And so this is just another thing that they can come and look at and work with and really another piece.

Herb: 00:37:04

Of the puzzle that gives them, that gives them a better picture of, of what they can actually do. And you know, these parents are highly motivated to actually, they're homeschooling their kid.

They're, I mean they're looking, looking for ways to do this. So when we bring them your information, they're going to be really excited about this. So, and because it's like you don't know what you don't know.

And in this day and age right now of information overload, where you can find out anything, the problem is, is what do you look for?

And so now that we found you, now that we have this information that's going to help, help us with our kid, it's going to help some of our parents and it'll help me with my, with my brain trauma.

Kristina: 00:37:47

So, so with that being said, how do they get a hold of you? What's the easiest way for our parents, our audience to find you?

Dr. Melillo: 00:37:53

Yeah, and I think what you said is also true. There's so much information overload and anybody can say anything on social media. That's why you always have to really check the source.

You know, does the person that is saying this, have they ever actually researched it? Have they actually published anything on it?

Do they have really years of clinical experience or they are they just some person biohacking that's trying to sell a product, you know. But yes, people can reach me through my website drrobertmilillo.com that's M E L I L L O and Dr. Is Dr. Lowercase. Also I'm very active on Instagram.

I have courses for professionals that it's a certification fellowship course that they can access through my website. I have an adult ADHD course that people can do through my website. I have a advanced neuroanatomy course that people can do through my website.

Also I have on Instagram I just did last night an Instagram Live that was really the title of is it why doesn't, why doesn't my child speak? And really explaining this in really more detail. And people can access that now I believe through my Instagram Again at Dr.

Robert Melillo, very active on there. I have almost a million followers at this point.

And then I have a podcast called the Mallo Method Podcast Everything Brain that's a little bit more technical.

And then I have this podcast I do with my daughter that is called the Right Brain podcast R I T E and that's geared towards that Right Brain community. But we get a lot of, you know, big name singer songwriters and some celebrities and you know, it's pretty fascinating stuff.

So that's something that people can access as well. And then I have eight best selling books, I have 100 scientific papers that people, they're all open access. People can just download them.

So that's really, there's a lot of material out there people can get.

Kristina: 00:39:55

Excellent, thank you so much. And like I said, all of those links and things are also down in the show notes.

So if you didn't write them down fast enough, either go back and re listen which would be awesome or go down to the show notes and click those links for us. Dr.

Melillo as we're wrapping up, is there anything else that maybe we didn't touch on that you really wanted to talk about today or what are your kind of your final words for parents?

Dr. Melillo: 00:40:17

Yeah, I think the final words I always try to give is, you know, if you walk through any of our practices, we have two very active offices in New York and it says Hope lives here.

I think people have to understand that not only do most people out there working with this really don't understand what the problem is, but they also have more of a mindset that they'd rather paint a negative picture for you. And they tell you that there's nothing that can be done and that you just need to learn to accept it. And I understand that.

And, you know, but that was. That's what I was told, and that's not true. Now.

If that's your choice and you've gone through life and you've chosen to just accept it, I understand that choice, too. And I understand once you make that choice, it's hard to change.

But if you should choose that, you want to explore this, there are real solutions out there, and this is something that can be changed and we can do things that are life changing. So, you know, if somebody can't explain what the problem is, don't trust that they also tell you that there's nothing that can be done.

They take your hope away. We try to bring that hope back, but it's real hope. It's not false hope. It's real hope. And I just hope people that never give up that hope.

Kristina: 00:41:40

Thank you so much. Yeah. You're giving me hope again, right? Because we don't have it bad. We don't have it as hard as some of the other families.

But even if we can improve our son's life even just a little bit, that's going to make things better for us in the long run also. And for him.

That's the main thing, is for these kiddos to be able to be active and accepted and feeling like they belong or being at least happy with what they can do.

Dr. Melillo: 00:42:06

And I think also understanding that, and I don't say this to make people feel better, understand that this does start with a gift, that almost any child that has this imbalance and most parents recognize that. They know that my child can do some amazing things, but they struggle with other things. And it's because of this imbalance. And we can cr.

We can correct that without losing that gift. We can give a child their voice back without losing their genius.

Herb: 00:42:37

Son had a fun genius he would go watch a cartoon and then he would go into his room and disappear and come out with a three dimensional Lego thing that would move. So he had like a scorpion rhinoceros thing from a spider man show. And the tail would move and the arms would move and. And he built dragons.

It's like when I had Legos, I could build boxes and. And he's building these 3D Lego amazing things that were just out of this world.

Dr. Melillo: 00:43:11

And they get that gift from the parents. So you did nothing wrong. You gave them a gift. It's just a little bit. It may be a little bit too much.

And we need to be able to create balance, but that can happen in almost every case.

Kristina: 00:43:24

Awesome. Thank you so very, very much for being here today. Thank you for sharing all of this wonderful information.

We are going to be spreading this far and wide. So, parents, here we go. This is your chance.

Make sure you, like, review, comment, share this with other families that you know, need this information. Right? Let's get this out there. Let's make sure we're helping families the we can.

Herb: 00:43:44

And Dr. Merlillo, thank you for being here today. It's an inspiration. So many people have.

Have children with problems, and instead of researching and saying, no, I'm not going to accept that answer, they just accept it and they go down that road and. And use like, no, that's not good enough for me. And not only did you get more information, but now you're out here helping share it.

So that's the hero's journey. And so thank you so much for. For being a hero and for being out there and not only helping your son, but then helping other people's families.

That's just amazing. So thank you for being here today.

Dr. Melillo: 00:44:18

Thank you for spreading the word. Thank you.

Kristina: 00:44:20

Yeah, you're very welcome. All right, audience, that is it for us for today. Talk to you later. See you on the next show. Bye for now.

Herb: 00:44:27

Bye for now.